Often by the time I turn off the light and settle into sleep, it has already been quite a while since Dave dozed off. I have always been a night owl, although I am asleep by midnight fairly consistently these days. Not exactly early, I know, but a huge change from when I used to greet the sun before giving in to sleep.
Wednesday, Dave was out before I even had a chance to get into bed. As I slipped my feet under the covers he replied with, “nope”. I naturally asked what that was about. more…
As I mentioned in my last post about meditative writing, I often do writing exercises to get myself started. Following is a bit of freeform writing I did months ago that is unlike what I normally write, but it is interesting for me to read something that is in a voice so unlike me and a style that I hadn’t consciously thought to try. I’ve edited it slightly for clarity, but it is mostly a raw piece straight out of my silly brain.
Sleepy Kitty looks at Bunny with drowsy eyes refusing to lift his chin. She stops a couple feet in front of him and eyes him sideways, suddenly popping into the air she shifts directions in an instant and is off running full tilt away from Kitty, but she stops just as suddenly halfway down the hallway when she realizes he hasn’t taken up the chase. Kitty is bored with this game and needs a nap. Likewise, Bunny is bored with Kitty. What fun is it to sleep all day? Bunny hardly ever sleeps. All her energy comes quickly from eating and eating more and more still and pooping out pellets like a conveyer belt from her mouth to the rear. more…
When I sit down to write and I’m having a hard time getting started I follow a common writing exercise. I time myself and write for twenty minutes about anything, paying no attention to grammar, sentence structure or spelling. It always gets me writing, without fail, but when I relax and really get into it is when it begins to feel like meditating. more…
It has been a while since I’ve written about the joys of living in Silicon Valley and the kind of drama that goes on around here, but with the announcement of Apple’s ipad I guess it’s time to express such virtues of living in a bubble unlike any other once again. more…
I read an article recently about how Costco was keeping its prices down despite rising fuel costs by asking manufacturers to switch to rectangular containers from round. That way they were able to fit more product per palette and thereby more product in each truck. Such a simple change to make a big difference is ingenious.
Along a similar vein, Dave and I have always resisted accumulating more stuff that would then require us to to buy a larger home. Out here in Silicon Valley, going up to a much larger place is not only a bad financial decision, but nearly impossible for us. We’re always trying to find ways to be efficient with our space, but without spending a lot of money on handy organizational products or worse, personal organizers to come to our house and tell us how to buy and arrange such products.
Tonight I was pouring Dante’s kitty food into reused containers where I store the food until he’s ready for it and I realized a trickle-down effect of Costco’s change. Since they now sell square plastic cashew and peanut containers I am able to fit more in my closet after filling them from Dante’s gigantic bag of food.
Now I can’t wait for other manufacturers to catch on so I can buy yogurt, cottage cheese, and Smart Balance in boxy containers. We did cave in and buy some Snapware from Costco so we do have BPA-free non-round containers for our food too, but it would be nice to be able to continue reusing food containers simply to be less wasteful.
Do you have any organizational tips that are simple, but also so brilliant they must be shared?
At twenty weeks we had another routine ultrasound. This one took about an hour, during which time the sonographer took photos of every part of the baby that a baby has. She checked the size of my uterus, size of the baby, looked at the kidneys, limbs, spine, face, and spent quite a while getting different shots of the heart. Actually, she spent an extra long time on the heart because baby wasn’t quite in the best position for viewing that particular organ. She pushed on my belly a bit to try to induce some fetal shifting, but really only got shoved back and produced some wiggles, not a half somersault that I think she was hoping for.
I’m not really sure what exactly they look for in all these pre-natal photos, but apparently we should be getting the results soon. All I knew is that we would likely discover the gender, which we did. more…
I’ve decided that I’m missing a certain passion in my writing because I’m afraid to write about those things that make me feel passionate. It is a scary feeling, the feeling of passion and I don’t like feeling out of control. I wish I could go back to relinquishing control once in a while. I have built such a fortress of acceptable behavior around myself that I’m not sure when it’s ok to act out. Acting out in writing is probably ok, but even after years of therapy and over one year of weekly therapy specifically focused on recognizing my emotions and letting myself feel them, I am still afraid of them and afraid to let myself act as though I feel.
One of the writing exercises mentioned at the Foothill College writing conference I went to this past summer is to list the things I am passionate about, choose something from the list and write on that topic. I will incorporate this into my therapy by adding my own important requirement, reflection. more…
I’m finally feeling better! Yay! It was for about a month that I was feeling sick and extremely exhausted. Even after my dr. prescribed me drugs, the nausea felt better, but I just didn’t feel as though I could do much. I think I was just feeling weak from being so exhausted and from not eating enough.
Even after the nausea mostly went away I didn’t feel as though I could eat. Everything seemed gross or at the very least not at all appetizing. It’s hard to explain how I feel better now because there isn’t much I can specifically put my finger on. I just feel better. I can eat without feeling like I have to choke food down. I guess that does make a big difference. I’m still not super gung ho about eating, but it does feel a little easier and there are more things I can imagine myself eating.
I’ve even started craving a few things, like olives, or apples and bacon. Yes, apples and bacon together. A crisp, tart Granny Smith apple topped with a crunchy salty slice of bacon. My pregnancy tongue has invented a new appetizer! Does it sound tasty?
It has been about a month since I’ve posted and I have to apologize for leaving my audience hanging. The first week or so after finding out I was pregnant was great considering I didn’t have any symptoms except being a little more tired than usual and irritable once in a while. Then, the nausea hit me and I was sleeping most of the day. In addition to feeling crappy and doing almost nothing but eating, (or more accurately attempting to eat) sleeping and lying in bed watching TV, I found myself dealing with guilt over being completely unproductive. more…
