Something has frustrated me and it’s more than just a personal issue. It’s part of the epidemic of mommy guilt and an unfortunate side-effect of patriarchy, although it may not be immediately obvious that they are related. Continue reading
This week my son will be nine months old. Somehow, nine months became a major milestone to me. Now, Siddhartha is a grown up infant, almost a toddler. Soon he’ll be walking and he’ll say his first word. (If he hasn’t already. We’re still unsure whether he understands that it means something when he says, “hi”.)
In his first few months, the minutes felt like hours, the hours, like days. When people say that they grow up so fast, they fail to mention that you have to get past those first few months first. At that time, we wanted nothing more than for our son to be older. We were insecure, sleep deprived and we felt panicked. Also, he cried. A lot. Continue reading
I swear in front of my kid. When I knock something over I say “$h1t!” and the other day I’m pretty sure I even dropped the f-bomb. At this age (4.5 months), I don’t think it’s something to be too concerned about. It will be a long while before he’s repeating what I say and it’s not like those words actually hurt anything.
It’s so easy to view a baby of this age as something like a pet. I know that sounds awful to admit, but they have so much in common at this point. They communicate with you through cries and body language, they depend on you for most of their needs and although they can interpret tone of voice, they don’t know exactly what you’re saying to them.
Well, last week I was delighted to discover that Sidd is picking up on more than I thought he could at this point. Continue reading
A few months back Dave and I bought a condo in San Jose. It’s a nice place and it was damn expensive. Soon after moving in, I noticed a few cigarette butts on our patio. I had a minor freak out since I usually assume that people who are inconsiderate will continue to be so. I calmed myself by remembering that it could have been an accident and the folks upstairs might not have realized anyone had moved in down below. I reasoned that it might not ever happen again.
Soon after, I woke to discover our patio covered in ash, chew, spit, and more cigarette butts. Yes, it was as disgusting as it sounds. Continue reading
Yesterday I posted about outside pressure placed on women to have children and the difficulties encountered when deciding whether to have them or not. Today I will explain why I’m writing about women choosing not to have children while I’m currently pregnant.
Why am I writing this after I chose in favor of babies? Continue reading
It’s true. For years I did not want kids. Not all that surprising for someone in her twenties, I think. Your life on your own has just begun, you’ve moved out of your parents’ house, finished or are just finishing college, and beginning to build a career. If you are married, it has only been for a few years. You and your husband/wife are still trying to figure who should take out the garbage and how you can get to sleep at night when one of you is always in bed at ten while the other wants to read until midnight. Babies would just complicate things further.
But here’s the problem, once you’re married people ask about babies a lot. Continue reading